I am a triple minority. I am Chinese, a Catholic, and a woman. And I never felt safe in my own home country. The sentiment and stigma towards Chinese goes back a long way back in 1998, the year I was born, when the Soeharto regime fell and riots were breaking everywhere. The Chinese were being looted and raped because many people believe that Chinese are more privileged in the economic system. And I was terrified with every part of it, even though I experienced nothing. It became a collective memory that I am hated in my own nation. But back then, it became the reason that made me choose International Relations as my major. Because I thought that it would help me fight racism. I can say that how naive I was back then, to have a dream that I didn’t truly understand that it is just a too bleak wishful thinking.
Fast forward, I am now entering my fourth year of learning International Relations, and I can say that we are far too long from the ideal world we imagine. The #BlackLivesMatter movement made me imagine how it would feel to be black and being seen differently because of your skin color and how impactful it would be in your life. In my case, my eyes always gave away my heritage. And so to speak, I am only experiencing a little since I went to Catholic school and most of my friends there are Chinese as well. But the internet has shown me another view. It is now rooted deep in my core that no matter what I do, I will never be seen for my achievement, but as a triple minority.
And to imagine that somebody is stepping down your neck and people just watch as a bystander, I think it hurts more because it shows that they don’t care because they don’t have any idea what is it like to be you; to get looked down every single day of your life just because you don’t look like the majority of what is called normal. I get that everyone struggles differently, but what if your struggle is a part of a meaner system, that shouldn’t even exist after six thousand years of civilization? If people that lives in the past see us now, would they be proud of what we have make? Or would they be disappointed that we are still struggling with differences as humans, and we can’t put it down even for the sake of our own greater good? Or maybe the actual fact is humans really really hate each other and it doesn’t matter that death and despair runs in this house we live in. But then, we will undo the existence of us as a human, for we did not thrive to be the best being with brain cells and mind. We only see each other as a threat and we will forever see each other with suspicion. Don’t we, as a human, feel compassion towards others when they literally have experiences that are dissimilar with us and we still not gonna try to understand how hard it was for them to achieve what we called as ordinary? For racism is taught, but tolerance is learned. We have a choice to be responsible of our decision.
Personally, I am still trying to break the stigma as a triple minority. But in the end, it boils down to each and every one of us, especially the most privileged ones:
Can you use your voice for the better? Or are you gonna see this movement as if it’s not a part of you?
Tidak ada yang layak diperlakukan secara diskriminatif. Kirim tulisanmu sekarang, karena #YourStoriesMatter dan sekarang adalah #SaatnyaBerhenti.